Friday, April 28, 2006

Firing On All Cylinders

Spring continues to be springlike. These cool nights have been great. Have not found any morels yet, but I’ve only been hunting once, and it was too hot/dry that day.

It’s not official but I am most likely moving in with Mr. Man in August. The offer came most propitiously: I’d not found a new single dwelling yet and had been saying that something would just fall in my lap soon. Ta-da! I like MR, love the house, LOVE the location, and would absolutely love to save money by sharing living expenses. I owe people money -- not just my credit card peeps but real, helpful people -- and, well, I cherish my kneecaps. Sure, having my own house is preferred, but if I save money for a year or two, maybe then I can buy a place of my own. How sweet would that be?

My ex seems to have found a mortgage company that will refinance our house in her name only. That’s a big weight potentially off my mind. I’ll breathe easier when it’s a signed deal, but this is good progress regardless.

My violinist lady friend and I are getting along swimmingly. She’s a peach and a hottie. Sushi tonight with her and some of her friends.

The Big East Leg of the book tour was fun and weird, just how I like it. Erie, Pittsburgh, and Cleveland over a four-day weekend. My livejournal has all the details if you wanna check it out. Next weekend I’m reading at the Blue Bottle Café in Muncie, and the Chatterbox Jazz Club in Indy with musical accompaniment by Kyle Quass.

Work is going well on all fronts. I’m finishing up a freelance chapbook this weekend (and collecting payment -- w00t!); my other, steady freelance gig claims the next issue will be an “easy one” -- but I’ll believe that when I see it; and my day job is just humming right along. We rearranged office furniture so things are much more ergonomically sound and the Terrible Two are much less snarkier for the nonce.

In late June I’m going to radio theatre camp for a week in severe south central Missouri. I’ll be co-directing live sound effects and teaching a couple of classes on performance of same. Paid gig, too, and a couple of good friends from B-tizzle are going as participants, so we’ll carpool most likely. A one-way eight-hour drive into the Ozarks is the suck, lemme tell ya. Also may hook up with my ex’s brother, who was the closest thing I ever had to a brother and whom I’ve not seen or heard from since the wedding. He’s like that, though. Hopefully he’ll still talk to me. Knowing Mark, I’d say yes.

Tuesday, April 18, 2006


Health: I'd say I'm at 90% go! Phlegm is down. Voice tone is up. I'm sleeping like shit but hey, ROCK AND ROLL!

Weather: Lovely!

Past weekend: Hotcha!

Rent: I may be moving in with a longtime friend. MAY be. I have been enjoying a house all to myself. I would enjoy his location and splitting house expenses even more. Hmm.....

Last night: Played with my godchild and visited with her 'rents (long overdue). This begs the question, though: when one gets divorced, is one still a god "parent" or am I now the creepy old single god-uncle? How does that work?

House: Ex continues to drag feet and not communicate. The sleeping dragon is beginning to stir. He's been sleeping like shit anyway.

Tonight: I'm going to see Saul Williams (slam "founder" -- he really just made it more Hollywood; didn't actually start it) on campus. w00t!

Tour: I'm leaving ass-early Friday morning for the Big East Leg of my book tour: two readings Friday night in Erie, PA; one Saturday night in Pittsburgh; then Sunday night in Cleveland, and then home.

I plan to hunt morels with my violinist lady friend Monday when I get back, for it is her birthday, and there also shall be cake.

That is all.

Saturday, April 15, 2006

My Poor, Poor Dulcet Tones

I feel much better but the sickness seems to have turned into more of an allegry kind of thing now: eyeballs are hurty, phlegm factory working overtime, my voice is better but I can barely get any wind behind it, and -- lovely! -- I wake up this morning with a nice juicy sty in one eye. I think that's my body's way of expelling demons from every available orifice. "Hey, guys, here's a route we haven't tried yet: the eye holes! This way!"

Hot compresses have worked it down to a mere nub, and after hacking (and hacking and hacking) away into the sink, my phlegm count is back down to manageable. But Christ on a Danish, how am I supposed to read at my book release party tonight??? I sound like an asthmatic Peter Brady. I guess I'll just have to whisper it all into a mic emo-style.

Anyway, I took out all the storm windows and put in all my screens, so the house now has some ventilation. April is NOT supposed to be this warm. It is quite lovely other than that, though. And while they're dangerous and a little scary, these harsh storms lately are awesome. I'm a huge fan of inclimate weather in general. Plus, I am a heavy sleeper and I slept right through the tornado warning siren the other morning. So in my solipsistic world, I guess it never happened.

Hope to see some of you lurking fools tonight!

Thursday, April 13, 2006

It's springtime!

When a young man's fancy turns to thoughts of hubba hubba!

My interests also turn to things woodsy, although that's a little different this year, seeing's how I'm not living in the middle of the woods anymore. I still have trees and a surprising (but then not so surprising, considering their tenacity) quantity of wildlife, but far too much traffic. Still, I can see the moon and stars where I’m at and, as a friend pointed out last night, you can see them in town too. You just have to remember to look for them, and I do.

Anyway, morels. MORELS! I think I may have already missed the boat on wild shroom season this year. It's a delicate balance of cool (but not freezing) and damp (but not really wet) weather that really pops them out, and today it's supposed to be in the low 80s, which is really too warm. Still there is hope. I'm going to see about hunting around the yurt a friend owns but does not live in in Owen Co. Last I heard he had FIELDS of them out there but rarely hunts.

Speaking of wildlife, I was driving on the 46 bypass toward work this morning when a turkey flew overhead and between me and the dump truck a few car lengths behind me. Yes, turkeys fly, just poorly, not very gracefully, and low to the ground. There's been a lot of activity lately in Criderville (that stretch of "green" space along both sides of the new bypass, owned by Crider & Crider Construction). I've noticed quite a few roadkill deer lately, buzzards hanging out in my back yard (pleasant!), and now an early morning turkey flyby. Check your six, Frodo, they're scouring the Shire.

In other news, I broke up with C recently. Just wasn't working out between us. She's requiring far more commitment and other intangibles than I am able to ... uh, commit to right now. I’m not incapable! I just don’t wanna. I like her quite a bit actually, but the tangible sense of disappointment I had been grokking had really started to make me sour -- to question myself as a person. Nothing wrong with that! But I consider myself single, not just "divorced," and have done plenty plenty plenty navel-gazing self-eval over the past few months about that failed union. I'm not over it by any stretch, but I feel I'm ready to be over it, and want to be with someone (when I choose to be with someone) who is happy with me, not constantly questioning me and how I am or am not dealing with divorce and whether or not I am making or have made good decisions. Let’s just have a good time! Either you like me or you don't. I've already got a therapist, thanks.

That was cold. But it's true! I’m still inviting her to parties and whatnot, because I do like her and she really hit it off with some friends of mine. She’s just too much for me to handle on my own.

I have also been dating a woman I’ve had a crush on for sometime, and kismet finally brought us together. We just kept missing each other (one arriving at a party as the other was leaving, that kind of thing). It’s been nice, low-key, and easy! We’re still kind of in that getting-to-know-you stage, which is fun and weird and ultimately rewarding.

I’m in the midst of a BOOK TOUR to promote my first book of poems. It has been great so far and I’m only about 4 dates into a 20-date hitch. My voice currently is trashed from the sickness, so it’s good I don’t have a reading for another week. Otherwise, I feel pretty good; probably about 85% healthy, but my dulcet tones have turned to trailer trash. Actually I sound a little like Lauren Bacall or perhaps a sorority chick after a hard night of Jäger Bombs and too many Marlboro Lights.

Lastly, my Poem-a-Day project for National Poetry Month is back up to speed. Inspiration has been coming fast and furious, which is cool. Most writers worry about the time when they “run out of ideas.” I usually run out of time first.

I’ve been musing lately about Miklós Radnóti, a Hungarian poet John Pearson got me hooked on years ago. His story is very sad but ultimately uplifting, and his poetry is surreal but beautiful. One of my poems this month is about his wife exhuming his body and finding his last poems in his pocket.

Monday, April 10, 2006

Imminent Collapse ... Has Arrived!!!

I'm sick. I knew it was coming at some point, and it dropped on me out of nowhere like a ball-peen hammer of justice. I hosted a late brunch yesterday (more lunner than brunch actually but featuring breakfast foods), and the last person couldn't have been gone an hour before I collapsed on the couch in a fit of bleahh.

I took off work today, and slept till about 12:30 but feel like I need about 14 hours more. So I'm going to do a little more typing/surfing here at the library, then crawl back to my hidey-hole and lay down before I fall down.

I thought some air and sunlight would do me good. And in truth, my soul feels a little cleaner now. I had to do some personal dirty work post-brunch, and that went remarkably well but I was primed for it, so it was fairly painless for me. Staying home from work was a no-brainer; usually I agonize about those kinds of decisions, but I have the time to use. Besides, I am positive I'm sick at least partially because I haven't been treating myself so good. I mean I'm not necessarily abusing myself. My numbers are good: Drinking is down. Smoking is now social only, I think. Sleep is good but the hours are fewer. That last I think is the kicker. I'm not the stay-up-and-worry type; I just tend to oveschedule myself, often ridiculously so.

Taking it easy today seemed to be just what Dr. Tony ordered. I also could do with a little pleasure reading (kind of a rare treat) and am three poems behind on my poem-a-day project for this, National Poetry Month. So I drove downtown and parked, then walked up and down 4th Street and Kirkwood, laid shirtless in the new grass of Dunn Meadow and wrote a poem about John Lennon, then walked to the library for Innerwebby goodness but GOD DAMN do I feel like hammered shit. Better than being totally couch-bound I suppose but still.

The sick is centered in the back of my throat, and my mucus membranes are working overtime to produce this thin, relatively clear crap that makes swallowing a real bitch. I think I'm going to try something OTC to try to nuke it. Perhaps ZICAM. I've also got metric ass-loads of fresh fruit in the house leftover from the brunch, plus many helping of biscuits and gravy -- comfort food of the gods, if the gods were from Greene County. I also have Shadow of the Vampire to get through, so my evening, she is set.

Between the book tour, working as much OT as possible, finishing up a frelance project, my fabulous dating life, trying to tie up the last loose ends on my house/mortgage, trying to figure out where the hell I'll be in August, therapy, random sleeplessness, long road trips, counseling friends, etc., etc., etc., -- Oh, and let's DO NOT forget etc. -- imminent collapse into illness has been anticipated. My pace has been pretty relentless all of 2006. I've also been interacting with more people than I usually have in the past, and people, as we all know, are taxing and germy. So a little R&R is in order, and hopefully this ... this THING will abate before too long. 'Cuz tomorrow I have a poetry workshop, Wed I'm officiating a slam on campus for the Hip-Hop Congress, got a date after therapy on Thurs..........