Tuesday, July 25, 2006

Instant Review: Donating Blood

Top 10 Indications Your Phlebotomist Might Be Mentally Divergent:


10. “Which arm do you prefer we stick? The left? Okay.” Then after waiting 10 minutes for an available left-handed (?) chair: “You know, you have much better veins in the right arm. Is there any reason you don’t want us to stick that one?”

9. (Referring to my veins, I think): “Mmm, mmm, I just can’t decide which one I want to stick! They both look good.”

8. Constantly uses “stick” as a verb, until she begins to sound a little Patti Smith-ishly casual about it.

7. “Come on, squeeze that ball. Come on, squeeeeeeeze it. And release. And squeeeeeeeze. And release. That’s it. Good.”

6. *Prick* “Ow!” “Okay, let’s get it into the vein now....” (WTF?)

5. “You’ve never passed out or anything while doing this, have you?”

4. Has some kind of nasal deformity/wound, and so is wearing a nose cast, thus:



(Okay, not that bad, but disconcerting nonetheless.)

3. Constantly asks you if you’d like something to drink, then finally takes a hork off her own hip flask.

2. *Pop!* Needle's out. “You may go to the cantina now.” Cues Star Wars band.


And the number one Indication Your Phlebotomist Might Be Mentally Divergent:


1. “So what are you doing after the bloodletting?”

Instant Reviews

HERO: Gorgeous and possibly even more spell-binding than Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon, which really won my heart. I love the set-up for the stories, and I thought there was just the right mix of seamless CGI, wire-fu, and trad fisticuffs to push the action into fantasy while keeping it fairly believable.

ALIEN VS. PREDATOR: Yes! God yes! As a cow-orker commented, basically 23 minutes of good interspersed amid 100 minutes of suck. But oh those 23 minutes! I especially liked the teaming of Predator with the spunky grrl protagonist, and her Alien-head shield/tail spear combo was inspired. The storyline/back story was ... Christ, why even bother mentioning it?

Tonight's double-feature:
CAPOTE
HOSTEL

Friday, July 14, 2006

Dinner Guests

When the vacant, bush-hogged lot next door looks better than your yard, you know it's time to mow. So....

After about an hour of mowing in the blazing early evening heat last night, I take a tepid shower and am sitting in front of the fan, trying to cool/dry off, having some dinner, when I see a family of deer come out of the hickory copse next door and start plucking leaves off the lower branches.



Not the greatest picture in the world, but I was naked, standing on the back porch, and trying to zoom in and shoot with one hand all at the same time, before they noticed me and slowly wandered off. I believe there were three deer all together: Mama and two wee fawns.

Later, I step into the back room to put some things away (yes, the fridge is in the back room, not the kitchen ... and yes, I was still naked). I had left the back door open ... and in flew this li'l guy.



I haven't ID'd him yet, but he whizzed round and round, banging into windows and doors, trying to get out. I finally made it and I cheered.

Wednesday, July 12, 2006

Mini-Update-lette

Once I get 2 CDs with about 350 images back from my violinist lady friend, I shall enthrall you all, gentle readers, with tales of high adventure on the West Coast. Beyond that:

Work goes well. Certain ripples have resolved to placidity, rather than erupting into tidal waves. This is good! Plus, I got a raise.

My ex refi'd and the house is now all hers. Simultaneously: load off my mind + best of luck, H!

I have no less than 4 offers of freelance work pending.

My house is as hot as a hot house with no AC in Indiana in July. Use your imagination....

Joe and I are gearing up for another Midwest book tour this fall.

Bike riding has been wonderful and not nearly as exhausting as I thought it might be.

I haven't mowed my yard since Memorial Day Weekend. Must. Mow. This. Weekend.

My nifty new bodhran is lovely but in this humidity it sounds like I'm flogging a moist shopping bag.